How should you tell your kids about your divorce?

On Behalf of | Dec 16, 2023 | Divorce

If you and your spouse have decided to divorce, you may have many concerns going into the process. One of these concerns is likely how your children will cope with the end of your marriage.

As you get ready to tell your children about your impending divorce, there are steps you should take to prepare for this conversation. Knowing how to handle this initial discussion can help your children see the divorce process through with resilience.

Prepare for the conversation

According to the U.S. Census, the divorce rate in the U.S. declined between 2011 to 2021, but many families still had to navigate the divorce process with their children. Before initiating the conversation about your divorce, take time to prepare yourself. Ensure you have a clear understanding of the key points you want to convey and anticipate potential questions your children may ask.

Choose the right time and setting

Select a time when everyone can sit down without distractions, providing a conducive environment for an open and honest conversation. The setting should be comfortable and familiar, allowing your children to feel secure and supported.

Present a unified front

When discussing the divorce, present a united front with your soon-to-be ex-spouse. This unified approach reassures your children that both parents remain involved in the decision and committed to supporting them through the process.

Assure your children of your love and support

Reassure your children that your love for them remains unchanged. Emphasize your commitment to supporting them emotionally and address any concerns they may have about the impact of the divorce on their lives.

Encourage the expression of feelings

Create a safe space for your children to express their feelings and ask questions. Be receptive and listen actively, acknowledging their emotions without judgment.

Maintain a consistent routine

In the midst of change, maintaining consistency in routine can provide a sense of stability for your children. Discuss any potential adjustments to schedules or living arrangements while highlighting that certain aspects of their daily lives will remain unchanged.

If you anticipate significant emotional challenges for your children, consider involving a professional counselor or therapist to provide additional support. Professional guidance can help children navigate their emotions and cope with the changes brought about by the divorce.